My Life

My life is changing every day in every possible way, my dreams never quite at they seem.  I know  I have felt like this before but now I am feeling it even more. For once in my life I have someone who needs me and I have needed so long.  I won’t let sorrow hurt me not like it has hurt me before. Now I can go where my life leads me . Somehow I know I will be strong I can touch what my heart used to dream of long before i know...We all want to live our dreams, and create the life we want but it can be scary to think what will happen if we follow our heart when it does not seems very practical.  I was living my dreams far from it actually  I was spending much of my time with friends , to avoid confronting the fact that I couldn’t stand my life.  I’m a student and hated to go to college. I woke up and was unhappy on a daily basis. Then one day I started questioning and I realized that I couldn’t live like this anymore I had to do something about it. Then iIstarted to work on myself I thought about the life I  really wanted to have.  I started getting clear about what I  wanted and I worked hard to change my beliefs and replace habits. I created more effective empowerment once I started to reclaim my dream and i started to come alive. 

Where did  I go wrong? I don’t know .as a child  until the age of 15 i used to be the happiest girl in the world. I was always a popular girl with  lots of friends, smart as well and always joking around.  I have a very loving family. Then at the age  of 16 i had my heart broken for the first time .When I  finally got over it after a while I was right in the  middle of my teenage crisis. No self-confidence probably because of my broken heart, not too pretty either . 16 isn't  a good age.  But I also realized one thing  I  had even more friends than before but I was starting to lose my good and real friends.  Instead of trying to get closer to my good friends I let the situation get worse. By the end of the year I was exhausted to see something else.  I went to a college which was very snobby and it was very difficult to fit in at first. Luckily i met some awesome people who become my close friend and i had a circle of friends and it was good enough. In the meantime I lost touch with my friends from my past school.. At first I felt weak for not being able to consciously override my existing behaviour patterns and simply to be newer and healthier . It took me a lot of honest and thoughts  about myself. I begin to realize, understand and accept what was preventing me from  living a life free from bitterness.