Three friends and I jumped into a taxi on our way to a party at a posh hotel in Kathmandu. I had negotiated a rate of NPR 400, which I thought was decent as the cab driver had started at NPR 600. One of my friends sitting in the back seat said, “You’re a terrible negotiator” and I kind of “lost it”, retorting with, “but you spend NPR 325 on a beer”. My thoughts were focused on the amount of money that would be spent for this entire evening as a number of ex-pats and Nepalis enjoyed an evening out.
We arrived at the posh hotel, where I had been once before for a similar party, and had some moments of dread. I had been debating as to whether or not to go to the party because I felt uneasy, i.e. how could I justify the work that I was doing with the amount of money that would be spent in this one evening? I decided to attend because it wasn’t about me but was for the person who invited me. Although I had a good time, talking with others, I left the party thinking that I wouldn’t do this kind of thing again, especially when I saw a woman outside of the hotel her head draped in her knees and then “asking for money”. I proceeded to hop into a taxi with three others and spend NPR 600 to get home.
A few weeks ago a friend had asked me to help him organise a 3 x 3 basketball tournament for senior boys from 16 schools. The day after the party at about 7:30 AM I boarded a tempo with my friend Simone to take us to the court. One has to note that I had only met with my friend once, exchanged a few e-mails and this was the extent of my help.
When I arrived I saw that the court was totally wet, drenched from the rains that morning or the previous evening. I immediately set out to find brooms and get some students motivated to start cleaning. I also measured the height of the rims to ensure that they were 10 feet high. Essentially I walked in as if I “owned the place” and as a foreigner, many times I am allowed this luxury, even if I’m totally off base. I don’t always approach my life with this type of attitude, but organising to me means being in charge.
After the puddles were kind of washed away and the tournament was about one hour overdue to start, without many of the teams being in attendance, I motioned to get all of the players and coaches together to “lay out the rules”, i.e. primarily how I’ve learned to play 3 x 3 basketball. As I was talking, there was some commotion amongst the coaches saying that they would boycott the tournament if we played by “my rules”. I was told that we would be using other rules which turned out to be the official FIBA 3x3 rules of which I was totally unfamiliar.
Similar to my “losing it” reaction in the taxi the previous evening, I again somewhat “lost it”. My friend who organised the tournament, also seemingly unaware of the rules, must have thought to himself, “Why did I invite this foreigner?” To my surprise the entire day, rules, referees and all, had in fact been organized by the coaches of the 16 teams, some of whom also doubled as referees.
Throughout the day I sat, watched and learned about how FIBA, the International Basketball Federation, conducts 3 x 3 tournaments. When I made it home I also decided to find out more about FIBA which is the world governing body for basketball, an independent association formed by 213 National federations of basketball throughout the world. FIBA is recognized as the sole competent authority in basketball by the International Olympic Committee (IOC) and is a non-profit organization and, in principle, does not pursue any objective of economic character for its own gains. The headquarters of FIBA is in Geneva, Switzerland.
As we took a lunch break, I went to a restaurant with three young Nepalis. I recounted the morning and what had happened over rules and how I reacted. On a larger scale, I related my “confrontation” to countries and how they bring “their rules” to various negotiations. We also discussed politics in Nepal and how it seems that each “party” has its own set of rules, making it difficult to negotiate common ground. I talked about how the standing of the US in the world used to be very different, as the country could set the “rules”. But now given power shifts there are new sets of rules set from many other countries which must be understood if one is to find common ground and have successful negotiations.
As the tournament ended the sky literally opened up and what had once been a basketball court was now a swimming pool. I realized from spending the entire day watching basketball that I have to do much more work with teaching the fundamentals of the game, which is sorely lacking.
On the bus ride homes I was touched by the warmth of the other passengers, one young man walking me to the next bus, on another the money taker saying “good night” to me with everybody on the bus laughing.
On Sunday the magic of Nepal continued with a signing of an MOU for a new television program on Himalayan TV, a visit to Boudha and the magic that always appears as I watched the many “worshippers”, walking around this gigantic stupa. I also observed a funeral procession and the lighting of candles as night appeared.
The disparities in life will always bother me, but in the moment I can be happy in Nepal, where the “rules” are very different.
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